FRIGHTWIG!!!
one of the greatest days to be had
The first band featured this week on Jam in the Speaker has a very special place in my heart. Not only is Frightwig responsible for inspiring countless women to start bands of their own, but they’re also the coolest, funnest, and wittiest gang of rockers.
Founded by kindred spirits, Deanna Mitchell and Mia d’Bruzzi in San Francisco in 1982. They then met their drummer, Cecelia Kuhn, and Frightwig was born! There is truly something so magical about witnessing lifelong friends do their thing together, making art, making music. Cecelia left the physical world in 2017, and is kindly and lovingly remembered by the band. A drawing of Cecelia chucking the bird while looking like a saint, wearing a flower crown and surrounded by stars is the cover for their recent singles by Kuhn released posthumously: “Shine Your Light” (where she says “someday we’ll go back to the stars” before the song begins) and “The Possum” where she plays accordion. For a more detailed history of the band, here’s their page: Frightwig's Herstory
On November 4, 2023, my sister, Caroline, and I made the drive to NYC (we do this often), to see Frightwig perform a matinee show in Ridgewood, Queens. . For the record, I am still in shock over this day because the energy was so incredible. I was honestly in disbelief when we bought the tickets—Frightwig hadn’t played a show in NYC in years.
The San Francisco band has quite a lot to brag about, but they are humble, incredibly down-to-earth people. Frightwig inspired so many musicians! Jennifer Finch of L7, Kat Bjelland of Babes of Toyland, and Courtney Love of Hole all started bands after seeing Frightwig live. Theo Kogan notes seeing Frightwig in NYC in the 80s influenced and inspired the Lunachicks to form. After reading Kathleen Hanna’s Rebel Girl I learned how big of a fan Tobi Vail of Bikini Kill is. And of course, Kurt Cobain famously wore a Frightwig tee in his 1993 MTV Unplugged in New York Recording. As Chappell Roan might say if she were talking about Frightwig, they are your favorite band’s favorite band, and I think that’s a very beautiful thing.
A near traffic-less drive from Rhode Island to NYC was filled with the sounds of singing L7 cranked all the way up. (It sometimes feels sacrilege to listen to the band you’re on your way to see.) After successfully finding a stellar parking spot (walking distance from not only the venue, but also where we grabbed a quick brunch and somehow had time to go thrifting), we had just enough time to walk to the TV Eye to arrive promptly at 12:58PM. The time gods were clearly on our side this day because howw?!!!
We stood outside of the venue, feeling a little awkward to enter so early, but eager for the event to get going. We stepped into the courtyard of the venue and decided to smoke a cigarette before entering the building as a means to settle in and take in the fact that we were about to see Frightwig live— it felt like the commemorative thing to do, and it kind of was. We had arrived so early that the person scanning tickets hadn’t even arrived yet so we lingered awkwardly in the main entryway when suddenly we were standing in front of Deanna Mitchell, and to our right stood Mia d’Bruzzi behind the merch stand. Holyyyyy shit.
Caroline began nudging my arm as I nudged hers. “Dude that’s Frightwig,” she whispered, as I looked at her with my older-sister “duh!” reaction back at her, followed by us freaking out. OMG, Frightwig! Next thing you know we’re hugging, and shooting the shit about what it was like being in an all-girls band in the 80’s. “I booked almost all of our shows,” Deanna stated proudly. I really couldn’t believe we were shooting the shit with Frightwig! Deanna noticed Caroline’s Lunachicks shirt, and next thing you know we’re being introduced to Jeanne Fury, who wrote Fallopian Rhapsody with the band. We bought tees from Mia and Deanna while they showed us the vinyl artwork for We Need to Talk… (2023) and for Shine Your Light (2023). Deanna paused at the cover of Shine Your Light seeing Cecelia’s picture, and it was clear how palpable Deanna’s love for her still is.
Loveletter, opened the show, and they definitely rocked the room and helped get us in the mood to grooove. They actually just released their first EP a couple months ago called Testament and I highly recommend! In between sets we went back outside to hang on the patio and mingle. That’s when I thought I noticed Gina Volpe (lead guitarist of the Lunachicks, frontwoman of Bantam, as well as solo artist) in the crowd. My sister is a super-recognizer (it’s a real thing, just look it up) but somehow couldn’t confirm whether it was or not. Some super-recognizer she is— maybe it’s a performance anxiety thing. Either way we walk outside and next thing you know, Jeanne Fury is introducing us to Gina! Caroline and I had another “pinch me, I’m dreaming” moment, obviously. And of course because Caroline was wearing her insane fan-made Lunachicks tee, Gina asked for a picture because she loved the fact that someone was brave enough to wear that design out— LOL.
While we were on total cloud 9 before Frightwig went on, somehow it got even better. As we walked back into the venue, our eyes were squinty from the contrast of the beaming sun to entering the dark venue space, as our pupils adjusted to the neon and stage lights. The nook of the club felt cool in contrast to the the sunny day, the lighting was cool, the mood was cool.
I laughed and cried during Frightwig’s set; an abundance of big feelings arose. Mia and Deanna began the set by giving me and Caroline a shout out— by name! They told us to keep playing music— if they can do it, so can we. How fucking rad is that? Tina Fagnani drums for the band now, and fits right in! I always love seeing bandmates interact with each other on stage, especially in the subtler ways, like a quick nod or a smirk. It’s clear the chemistry is there and that’s always a joy to see. The show had such a warm intimate feel, it was like we all knew each other. I realize how heady that sounds, but I’m saying it anyway.
Hot Air Rising was their first song in the set, an anti-war song, a message to politicians to stop using our money to commit great acts of violence. Because fuck that! Mia began, “How can you say it’s ok to use my money to pay men to kill men?” and immediately I felt my entire body radiate with chills as Deanna’s cries harmonized in the background. These women have not stopped their activism and will not stop. Their album We Need To Talk… has multiple anthemic songs rejecting the politics and and corruption. But there are also songs like “Aging Sux” and “Ride Your Bike” that poke fun at the woes and joys of simpler topics, like masturbating and getting old— definitely way simple.
Click below to see the performance posted on their YouTube Vevo account:
During “Crazy World,” Deanna changed the lyrics from “how come a missile looks like a cock?” to “how come these missiles never stop?” A very important and intentional choice as we continue to plead for a ceasefire. The emphasis on human justice and their lifelong dedication to speaking out against the man is what really inspires me. As someone who also isn’t afraid to speak up, I’m familiar to the criticism. Frightwig affirms that it is far cooler to say it than to not. While band’s music highlights the inequalities of the world they still manage to capture the hilarity and humor in the hypocrisies and mundanity of everyday life. Like losing your AmEx checks.
As tradition the band always performs “Delta Dawn,” which of course my old soul sister knows all the words to. Deanna noticed Caroline singing along and invited her to join them on stage to sing the song. I was actually in tears, it was such a sweet moment. And also a proud sister moment, seeing her sing on stage in front of a room full of people was really cool to witness.
The show wouldn’t be complete without playing “A Man’s Gotta Do What A Man’s Gotta Do,” and inviting the men— and anyone else— to dance on stage. This song was actually one of the first Frightwig songs I ever listened to and after the first listen immediately played it over again. It’s so witty. Historically, Frightwig invited men to strip on stage in an act of role-reversing gender stereotypes. Frightwig is as hilarious are they are smart, cool, groundbreaking, and kind. Since the 80s, Deanna and Mia have created a subversive, empowering, and fun set, and they continue to do so, because as much as things have changed, they’ve also stayed the same.
Click below to see the performance posted on their YouTube Vevo account:
A Man's Gotta Do What A Man's Gotta Do
Seeing Frightwig was truly one of the most special and memorable days of my life. The energy was so visceral, I only have to think about the day and I get goosebumps. Music is so incredibly special. The community Frightwig yields is one of love— not in a weird ‘free love’ kinda way, but in the sense that we all have each others’ backs without judgment. The show was one big party! I love you, Frightwig and hope to catch another show soon.
I am also linking their store because why wouldn’t you want to support their music and rock their cool ass tees?!